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Coming Full Circle [Jun. 3rd, 2005|12:08 pm]
pettek_project

axisofevil86
[mood |contemplativecontemplative]

CROSS POSTED IN MY OWN JOURNAL


It's been about a full year now since my public statement. It's been about a full year now since Pettek retired. Today was the second day I've seen him since he left LHS. It was very wonderful to see him even though I didn't get to talk to him as much as I wanted to due to the fact so many people were like

"Pettek! I haven't seen you in forever! How are you?"

I invited him to NHS Breakfast. He was honored to come and be invited by me. It was so emotional to see him and to tell him about everything that's been going on in my life. From me winning the Bell Award, to taking the AP Psych test, to finding my faith again, to telling him about everything going on in my friends lives.

It was sad really, because today is the last day really, I'm going to see LHS, before graduation. It was sad enough last year when Pettek retired and I wasn't able to share my senior year with him right there. But I realize, it was all for a reason. When he left, God sent Lorenz to help me find that something I've been looking for. Lorenz is one of Pettek's best friends. I guess life is mysterious like that. Even though Pettek is no longer there, I always will keep in touch with him, Lorenz, and DeCapua.

Pettek was so proud of me today. He told me though; it feels so good when everything comes full circle. When you start to give back and make an impact upon the lives of others. I guess he's right. I want life to begin. I want to be able to feel the gratification he's gotten throughout his life teaching. I've felt the warmth through those who have touched my life and have figured out who I am. Now, I need to go forth and do God's will and what makes me happy. I've reached that 4th stage in Maslow's hierarchy of needs where I feel fulfillment with who I am, now, the self-actualizing begins. I can only hope that I can start to become that person, whom I know would make Pettek proud and continue the line of mentorship that comes with the joys of teaching.

Thank you Pettek for helping me see how I affect the world. Thank you to all the people who've helped me become a person I can be proud of.
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Dear God [May. 22nd, 2005|11:28 pm]
pettek_project

axisofevil86
Dana Barker- Dear God

You were there behind it all,
To catch me if I should I fall,
You were mine and I was yours
For all time, forevermore

Dear God one thing I pray,
Help me out today.
Dear God one thing I pray
Help me out today.

Longing for just one more taste
To gaze in your adoring face
Memories will take your face
But never will you be erased

Dear God one thing I pray
Help me out today
Dear God one thing I pray
Help me out today

Dear God one thing I pray
Help me out today
Dear God one thing I pray
Help me out today
Help me out today
Shine some light my way.

Dana was in my Psych II class. He had an incrediable gift of music and was a fine composer. This song, always touched my heart. From time to time, I think of calling him to see how he is doing. He made Psych II an even more powerful expirence. He truly gave with his heart and was an amazing person. I miss him sometimes, along with Pettek.
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Looking for Something More... Help me find my hope again [May. 15th, 2005|03:32 pm]
pettek_project

axisofevil86
Switchfoot-"Something More (Augustine's Confession)"

Augustine
Just woke up with a broken heart
All this time
He's never been awake before

At thirty-one
His whole world is a question mark
All this time
He's never been awake before

Watching dreams that he once had
Feed the flame inside his head
In a quiet desperation of the emptiness he says...

"There's got to be something more
Than what I'm living for
I'm crying out to You"

Augustine
All his fears keep falling out
All this time
He's never been awake before

Finding now
His old dreams aren't panning out
All this time
He's never been awake before

But he's mad to be alive
And he's dying to be met
In a quiet desperation of the emptiness he says...

"Hey, I give it all away
Nothing I was holding back remains
Hey, I give it all away
Looking for the grace of God today"

Thank you for helping me find that grace again...
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A Song to Imagine...with so much meaning behind it... [Apr. 26th, 2005|11:21 pm]
pettek_project

axisofevil86
[mood |peacefulpeaceful]

Imagine- Lennon

Imagine there's no heaven,
It's easy if you try,
No hell below us,
Above us only sky,
Imagine all the people
living for today...

Imagine there's no countries,
It isnt hard to do,
Nothing to kill or die for,
No religion too,
Imagine all the people
living life in peace...

Imagine no possesions,
I wonder if you can,
No need for greed or hunger,
A brotherhood of man,
Imagine all the people
Sharing all the world...

You may say Im a dreamer,
but Im not the only one,
I hope some day you'll join us,
And the world will live as one.


This was the song I used for my public statement. It's kind of funny to look back at it now. So many things have changed from my public statement. I've become more religious. Out of the religious strife I've had in my life, in the past year, my relationship with God has grown so much. Imagine that? Pettek once told me, this song was his wife and his's song. It has a special meaning for me too. It makes me wonder, if I'll ever have someone to share that type of bond with. The world lost a good man the day Lennon was killed. He gave so much meaning and hope to people's lives. He's touched my life in so many ways. Its funny how little things touch us and change us. Its funny how we grow so quickly. Ironic almost.
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(no subject) [Mar. 19th, 2005|12:25 am]
pettek_project

axisofevil86
[music |Sarah McLachlan-I will remember you]

I wish I could turn back time, just to relive the moments again.

Sarah McLachlan-I will remember you

I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don’t let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

Remember the good times that we had?
I let them slip away from us when things got bad
How clearly I first saw you smilin’ in the sun
Wanna feel your warmth upon me, I wanna be the one

I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don’t let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

I’m so tired but I can’t sleep
Standin’ on the edge of something much too deep
It’s funny how we feel so much but we cannot say a word
We are screaming inside, but we can’t be heard

But I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don’t let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

I’m so afraid to love you, but more afraid to loose
Clinging to a past that doesn’t let me choose
Once there was a darkness, deep and endless night
You gave me everything you had, oh you gave me light

And I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don’t let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories

And I will remember you
Will you remember me?
Don’t let your life pass you by
Weep not for the memories
Weep not for the memories
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(no subject) [Oct. 14th, 2004|07:36 pm]
pettek_project

sevensweeney
Join @

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Letter [Sep. 21st, 2004|08:16 pm]
pettek_project

axisofevil86
I got a letter from Pettek today via DeCapua, thanking us for the birthday card. It made my day. I miss him so much. ~.~
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Pettek's Birthday [Sep. 10th, 2004|05:07 pm]
pettek_project

axisofevil86
Pettek's birthday is on Sunday the 12th. It would be nice if you all want to sign a card for him on Monday and I'm giving the card to Decapua to give to him. Also, he's out of town till Sunday night, but, if you want to call him to wish him a happy birthday, I can give you his number to do so if you don't already have it..
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(no subject) [Aug. 2nd, 2004|05:29 pm]
pettek_project

axisofevil86
Added a memories section, its still in progress because I'm sifting through people's old Livejournal entries.
Enjoy.
-Amanda
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(no subject) [Jul. 29th, 2004|12:48 pm]
pettek_project

axisofevil86
I cannot let go...
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